Chuck Locklear
fascinating characters, impactful books and messages
Learn a lesson from Prince Philip
I met Prince Philip on Netflix. I am a fan of historical fiction, and I watched every episode of The Crown. The show does not portray him as a perfect man. However, I am certain that he loved his wife. One of the best gifts a father can give to his children is to love their mother.
A Perfect Reminder
Father’s Day is a perfect reminder of this important principle. Fathers loving and treating the woman in your life with kindness and with respect is a habit. Just like any habit, the more you do it, the easier it is. Unfortunately, the reverse is also true.
It is easy to fall into a negative pattern of criticism and blame. The world is not perfect, neither is your wife. You can focus on the good things about her or the one or two things that you don’t like. I have learned the hard way that anything critical I say will be taken to heart by my wife. She values my opinion. I don’t completely understand why, but I have learned that my comments validate her value. Do I want to validate her value? Yes, I do, because I value her. She is a blessing to my life and the lives of my children.
Find Whatever Is Lovely
It is too easy to focus on the things we don’t like, the things we want to change. When we look at our partner, we see the 20% of them that we don’t like, instead of the 80% that makes us happy. We pick and pick at the parts that drive us crazy and overlook the parts that bring joy. Sadly some will leave their partner to find someone with the 20%, only too late to realize that they have lost the 80%.
I highly recommend the book, The 5 Love Languages, by Gary Chapman. It has been improving relationships for nearly 30 years. Its ideas are simple and conveyed with clarity and humor. Dr. Chapman states that “the desire for romantic love in marriage is deeply rooted in our psychological makeup.” As we strive to fulfill that desire, we can miss some basic truths about relationships.
Dr. Chapman uses the metaphor of the “love tank.” He suggests that we need to keep our partner’s love tank full. By focusing our attention in this way, we will be alert to signs that our partner might be crying out for love, that his or her emotional love tank could be running on “empty.” Dr. Chapman’s book is written for married couples, but its concepts can apply to all of our relationships..
The Children Are Watching
One of the best gifts a father can give to his children is to love their mother. Fathers loving and treating the woman in your life with kindness and with respect is a habit. Just like any habit, the more you do it, the easier it is. Unfortunately, the reverse is also true.
Your children are paying attention to your actions and words. This is true even if you are divorced from your spouse. It is true for boys and girls. For boys, you are teaching them how to treat women. You are teaching them how to have happy, healthy relationships and lives. For girls, you are teaching them how to expect to be treated. If you mistreat their mother, they will learn that this is normal and will accept mistreatment from the men in their lives. If you love their mother, they will not choose mates that abuse and disrespect them.
Fathers, devote yourselves to the mother of your children. Whether you have been perfect in the past or not, renew the love you have for the bride of your youth. Yes, you can learn a lesson from Prince Philip.
Also, see Gracie’s Story.
Copyright © 2023 Chuck Locklear
This is true my mom was very sick but my dad never left her even though they said the government could take care of her but he was devoted. Because he believed God that they became one and he made a promise that unto death do they part. God keeps his promises and he wanted to be more like him. This made others watching see the importance of devotion by his example.
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