How to Be Happy

Think about the happiest person you know. Were they also the wealthiest? When I think of happy people, I think of my own dad. He was probably the happiest and the most faithful person I have known. All you had to do was be around him and he would tell you. “Life is good. I wouldn’t change a thing.” But, he definitely was not the wealthiest person, and if you listened to him tell stories about his life, it was far from perfect.  He lived through some very traumatic experiences. I think we can learn how to be happy.

Success Trap

According to author Shawn Achor, The Happiness Advantage, only 10% of our happiness is determined by circumstances or the world outside of our own thinking. Unfortunately, most Americans are caught in the “Success Trap.”  We believe that success equals happiness. The more success we have, money, material wealth, status, the happier we will be. Stop and think about that a minute.  

My dad loved to tell the story of the time his sister, Thelma, got into a car accident with his father’s Model A Ford. They put her in an ambulance headed to the nearest big city hospital, which was in Charlotte, NC, serval hours away. His brother, Louis, and sister, Anne, rode with her in the ambulance. His father, my grandfather, followed on a bus.  After making sure she was settled into the hospital, they headed back home to the small town of Lumberton, NC. Louis and Anne rode back in the ambulance and my grandfather rode on the bus. On the way back, the ambulance got into an accident and another ambulance had to pick them up and take them back to the hospital. Ann and Thelma end up in the same room requiring major surgery.  

A Tough Day

When my grandfather got back to Lumberton, he was met at the bus station with a telegram (there were no cell phones then) that said he needed to head back to the hospital in Charlotte; he now had two daughters in critical condition. Meanwhile, back on the farm, my father and his brother, Lawrence, were in charge of the harvest. But, an “electrical storm” hit and lightning struck killing their only two hogs. Lightning also spooked the mule my father was using to haul corn out of the field. The mule took off, driving the wagon into the corn crib, destroying the corn crib, and causing all of the just harvested corn to spill out onto the rain-soaked ground. 

When my grandfather returned home late in the evening, he was met by my great grandfather who said, “Son, I got some bad news.” Of course, my grandfather was thinking is it possible for things to get worse. “Son, I know it seems bad, but I don’t want you to go off drinking. That’s not going to make anything better.”  Now, I’m not a drinker, but your car is wrecked, you have three children in the hospital, two in serious condition, the town’s ambulance is destroyed, your hogs are dead, your wagon is wrecked, and the corn harvest is ruined; these circumstances might drive anyone to drinking. Now, that was a tough day.

Six Techniques

Actually, the truth is opposite of how we usually think. Happiness is not dependent on success. Success is dependent on happiness. Achor’s research shows that 75% of success is determined by your happiness and performance. A positive attitude equals success. The best thing about this research is that you can train your brain to be more positive. Yes, being positive is learned behavior. You choose to be happy…or not.  I have some experience with this choice and let me tell you choosing to be happy is a lot more fun. So, this might be worth the investment. Here are some practical techniques you can do to train your brain to be happy. 

Gratitude:

“Count your blessings, name them one by one.” Count Your Blessings is a classic gospel hymn that many of us know. Make it part of your day to name three new things for which you are grateful. If you do this for 21 days you will have counted 63 gratitudes, but more importantly you will have established a positive habit. You could make Psalm 68:19 part of your daily prayer. “Blessed be the Lord, who daily loadeth us with benefits, even the God of our salvation. Selah.”

Journaling: 

Write down one positive experience from the past 24 hours. By writing down the details, you are actually reliving the positive experience (Philippians 4:8).

Exercise: 

Sure, we know exercise is good for us. It keeps our weight down; it makes us stronger, and it keeps us feeling youthful.  But, did you know that exercise can also make you happier? Exercise releases the “happy” chemical into our brains, dopamine, which is a neurotransmitter necessary for feelings of pleasure and happiness. What is the best way to increase your brain’s dopamine production? Exercise. So, walk, run, lift, jump, play — and get happy (1 Corinthians 6:19-20).

Meditation:

This allows our brains to block out distractions and focus on one thing at a time. So, don’t just read the Bible, meditate on the scriptures daily. Soak it up and apply each concept, one at a time, to your life (Joshua 1:8).

Acts of Kindness:

Do something thoughtful for others. “Lord, expand my territory. Help me to minister your light and your love to someone today.” As humans, we are wired to feel the greatest self-esteem when we know what we do is worthwhile… when we know we are making the world a better place (Galatians 6:10).

Positive Self-talk:

Each of us has a set of messages playing over and over in our heads. One of the ways to promote optimism, hope, and happiness is to intentionally fill our thinking with positive self-talk (Proverbs 18:21 and Luke 6:43-45).

So, let’s learn a lesson about how to be happy from my dad, a truly happy person. Let’s choose happiness. Which one of these practical techniques might you work to deepen? Which one might you begin to develop today?

Copyright © 2019 Chuck Locklear

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